The difference between doing one cross race in a weekend and two is that if you did two on the weekend it takes until about Wednesday to get the railroad spikes out of your quadriceps. If you do one it takes until Tuesday to get the finishing nails out. You don't realize this until you stagger across the room at a big meeting, making important colleagues think you are drunk.
Did I say drunk? Don't mind if I do. Martini, 4.5:1, with a couple olives. Biiiiig freaking glass. I'm not upset about a bunch of Republicans being elected to Congress. I'm upset about 535 human beings getting elected to Congress. I'm an issues guy, not a party guy, and I expect the new crew to foul things up as badly as the last crew, only mostly in wholly different (but occasionally exactly the same) ways. As long as we are governed by men, then we should not place our faith in government for men are inherently flawed. Women too, but don't tell my wife I said that. At the end of the day, what really matters most, is that this martini is delicious. I'd offer to make you one if you were here.
Sadly, my martini isn't like this at all:
Bond. James Bond.
It's more like this:
Bombed. James, Bombed.
You see that raggedy assed mallet there? That's what I used to crush the ice for my shaker. Yeah. A manly man doesn't mind mixing up martinis on his workbench. Sheee-it. What do you think paint shakers are for? Mixing chartreuse and lavender for the perfect bathroom tint? Hells no! Shaken not stirred, bitches! Super shaken, in fact. FWIW, that drill press, when you stick a 2" wood borer bit, makes the perfect margarita mixer. It's pretty good at shaving ice, too. The 3 horsepower motor and belt drive is probably a bit much, but hey, that thing ain't going to give out on you at a Jimmy Buffet concert, now, is it? You see the glue in the back? That's Titebond. It's no good at all for huffing, so don't even think about it. But it is good for gluing wood together if you actually need to the wood to stay stuck. Imagine Elmers wood glue (not the white stuff, the brown stuff). Now imagine it with a turbocharger, on crystal meth with a bad steroid habit. That's how good Titebond is. It's really the only stuff to use for serious woodworking. Or gluing your finger to a home improvement project. Don't ask how I know that.
Long day. I think I managed to piss off pretty much everybody I know. More of the same tomorrow. Nothing major to sweat for the race now, just a shitload of stuff to execute on. And maybe an announcement or two. Heading out to the park very early in the AM to coach the "staff" - all one of him - on where we need the grass cut. Should be fun.
4 comments:
+1 on the double up race impact; my thighs don't have spikes, but my heart rate told me in no uncertain terms this morning at practice that it was not done recovering. Sucking wind, can't pedal....HR 15 beats below where it should be.
I think I managed to piss off pretty much everybody I know.
You did it right, then.
What kind of gin? Vodka too, or just the classic 4.5:1 dry with gin and vermouth? Garlic, pimento, or no stuffing in the olives? These are important questions.
I'm sick, no chance of being recovered before Tachinno...pisses me off as it was one of the races this year I was all amped up to ride.
argh.
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